It's Alright Ma, I'm Only Bleeding *

Wolf: Of all animals the wolf is perhaps the most feared in terms of superstition, being a favourite disguise of the DEVIL and everywhere linked with evil. In times gone by, the mere sight of a wolf was supposed to be enough to render a man dumb, assuming that the wolf saw the man first, and similarly even saying the word ‘wolf’ risked an imminent encounter with one…On a more optimistic note…eating a dish of wolf’s meat will prevent a person from seeing ghosts. Sleeping with a wolf’s head under the pillow will ward off nightmares…
--David Pickering, Dictionary of Superstitions

Look. Listen. The wolf always runs in a pack, but when he is hungry, he runs bolder. A Chinese man said this on Magnum P.I., season 7, episode 16. Yes. I am deep into superstition now. An odd twist, but life is twisted, no? Let me up, I’ve had enough—Tom Petty said that, and I believe him. My life is twisted like a rabbit in flight and I fear there is no solace between here and where I will fall, bleeding in the snow. Ah! But what could one fear in the lotus land of plenty? Plenty I am sure. For these passing years, my life has been a hard corner, but things pass and come to pass, and now, I fear even I must go to ground. How long lord, how long (1)?
But what can I say here that will call off the pack; where are the golden promises to redeem? No. this is the long journey to the end of the night (2) and I know that these things are only faced alone. I am tired. The wolves are at the door and I am nearly struck dumb. Misfortune. There is no appeasing it. Pile the fire high and leave me here to die. There are some things that words cannot explain. Ford Maddox Ford may have written the saddest story ever told (3). Maybe. More than me have suffered, but we only feel our own pain. Indulge me. I feel quite lost. So. It is the wolf and me. Life will go on—but not perhaps for either of us. I miss the friends that I have gathered and the path that I have lost. I feel dumb—frozen with the fear. Where have I come from and where can I go? The ghosts are at the door. There must be some kind of way out of here; I can’t get no relief (4). Please. Even the wretched resent the maudlin. I am too sad to live, but too dumb to die. Let the wolves lick my face: i'm ready Ma. it's only a little bleeding left.
* Bob Dylan
1 Hunter S. Thompson
2 Celine
3 The Good Soldier
4 All Along the Watchtower, Bob Dylan